Live with Regis & Kathie Lee
JUNE 4, 1998 (SYND)



O.J. Simpson

I think O.J.'s kinda rehabilitating himself. Did you see where he was stabbing that woman with a banana? [Laughter.] Have you seen that? That's alot better. That's a step forward.




Canada


REGIS: So many funny guys come out of Canada. What is it about Canada that produces all these comedians?

NORM: I don't know. Because when I'm in Canada, no one's funny. [Laughter.]

KATHIE LEE: Do you think it's the long, dark, cold winters?

NORM: We don't have dark winters. We don't live in the Arctic circle. [Laughter.]

REGIS: But, they're long aren't they?

NORM: They're long and cold. And they're cold.

KATHIE LEE: And really cold.

NORM: Yeah, they're cold. I don't want to put too fine a point on it, but they're cold. [Laughter.]




Larry King's USA Today Column

NORM: Anything he thinks of -- he writes it down. And they're just completely random. He'll go, "Blue is a great color, but for my money: Yellow is the best!" [Laughter.] It's like crazy. ... "I don't care what anybody says: Hitler was a bad man!" [Laughter.] No one disagrees with that. ... He proposed to me once. [Laughter.] ... just during a commercial break, he asked me if I'd like to be his next wife. [Laughter.]




Bob Saget


KATHIE LEE: Bob Saget directed ["Dirty Work"].

NORM: Yeah, well, you know, there's bad news in anything. [Smiles and looks off stage.] [Laughter.]

REGIS: How is young Saget?

KATHIE LEE: He's actually right over there ... [Saget is invited to the stage.] [Applause.]

NORM: Bob's a great man.

BOB: And a good woman. We've been together for awhile now. [Laughter.]

REGIS: And now, he's a big movie director.

BOB: If it's a big movie. [Laughter.]

NORM: ... [Don] Rickles did "Casino" with Martin Scorcese, and he goes, "I just talked to Martin and I told him you [Bob Saget] were my next director and he goes, 'AHHHHH!' [Feigns heart attack.]" [Laughter.]

BOB: He left me a message, "I hit 2 and pound and I hit 3 and pound. I don't know how your Jew spaceship works!" [Laughter.] "Call me, Saget. I miss you. Don Rickles."




Norm Macdonald: Leading Man


REGIS: [To Saget] Can this guy become a romantic, leading man in the movies?

SAGET: Yeah. He turns me on. [Laughter.] All kidding aside. I've talked to a lot of --

NORM: Ladies!

SAGET: Alot of ladies, and they all say they find this man very sexy. [Hoots and Applause.] It's his eyes. They love his eyes.

KATHIE LEE: He has beautiful eyes.

REGIS: Beautiful eyes. They twinkle. [Laughter.]

KATHIE LEE: And he's got those Tom Selleck dimple things happening.

NORM: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

REGIS: The new Tom Selleck. Absolutely.

KATHIE LEE: He's got the little wavy hair thing happening.

REGIS: I think you're getting to Kathy Lee! [Laughter.]

NORM: Ohhhhh! Yeah, baby!